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56 Posts
Discussion Starter #1 (Edited)
Hi all, I wrote this for another forum but thought you needed a read to. Incase you are unaware, which you probably are, I'm a medical student from Australia.

During Movember (the month formerly known as November) I'll be growin a Mo. That's right I'm putting the Mo back on the face of Australian fashion for a great cause and I need your support.

Movember is a new charity event that raises awareness about male health issues and money for research into Prostate Cancer. Did you know...

Men are twice as likely to die from cancer than women.
Every year in Australia 2600 men die of prostate cancer – more than the number of women who die from breast cancer annually.
Around 10,000 new cases of prostate cancer are diagnosed in Australian men every year.
To sponsor my Mo please go to, enter my Rego number which is 1664 and your credit card details. Proceeds go to the Prostate Cancer Foundation of Australia to further research into Prostate Cancer. Donations of more than $2 are tax deductible. Given that Mo'vember actually falls over my exam period which includes 16 occasions where some world class Dr gets to give me crap for whatever he/she wants, I'll probably end up paying big time for the cause.

There is a competition between the states (adjusted for population) we are currently in the lead, as WA tends to be in charitable causes. It'd be great to keep it that way and roll some moolah in the direction of our prostates (not literally of corse).

Movember culminates at the end of the month at the Gala Partè where I'll be parading my Mo on the cat walk for a chance to be crowned the Man of Movember. If you want to be part of this great night a $30 sponsorship gets you free entry. All the ticket and gala details are at the Movember website.

I give money to charities, little kids with big eyes starving in some country I can't pronounce. Sick kids in my own country that need a new oxodehydrofribulator to keep their little heads warm when they have no hair. I even give money to wopping great gorillas in Rwanda, god knows why they eat bamboo or some shit and scare the crap out of me.
Now I'm no longer a kid, i'm not starving, i can pronounce the country i live in, am fine with my lack of hair, and (arguably) I'm not a gorilla.

So what is in it for me! Is there any worthy cause at all that benifits me out there? There is 1. I'll set a scenario for you all (girls this wont be as effective for you but use your imagination)

I'm sitting at my desk, graduated doctor, new MV, girl thats far to young for me that has been surgically augmented so her but can fit on my bike. Life is good.
You walk in "Hello Dr Evil." seeing the MotoGP trophy my MV race team just won on the wall, you grin as you think back to the massive piss up we had to celibrate on the weekend, in Valencia. (I told you to use your imagination)
Me "Wassup?" Now an acceptable word, in common useage. At this stage we know each other well. Other than racing together many times, i've been your Dr for many years after the Medical board started letting me practice again because of an incident that the Sunday times blew out of proportion.
You "I'm not peeing like i used to." We get straight into it cause i'm already getting sick of typing. You say this with no hesitation cause you trust me after delivering your third baby, and not telling your wife anything about it. I'm not as comfortable with this statement cause i know where it's heading.
"Can you still hit the top of the urinal with your stream?" I ask, with a grin but tremble in my voice. Given that 20 mins ago in my waiting room bathroom you tried to sign your name in pee, you confidently reply.
"No." This is the defining moment where it all goes bad. Big prostates can be bad news for a man of your age, not just cause you can't write your name in pee anymore, it can be a bad arse cancer that takes more motorcyclists out than a crack team of teenagers in Hyundai excels. Infusion says it best in Mo'vember post vol I
I say, seriously now but still trembling " In 2006 we got so close to getting the blood test to work well, but we ran out of funding. Thats a real pain in the arse" Freudian slip on my behalf, but you suddenly realise why i'm reaching for the latex and lube combo.
I have met very few men that enjoy having me put my finger up their bum, you strangely, are not one of them. I have never met a man that i have enjoyed sticking my finger up his bum, and somehow i doubt i ever will.

Yeah i'll give money to a lot of different causes, but the kids in Sao Tome & Principe can all starve to death, the little Aussie tackers can buy a bennie in winter like i bloody do, and the gorillas can learn to sew Nikes in a sweat shop as far as i'm concerned. If there is a worthy cause out there that's going to affect me its prostate cancer research. Now I'm sure you are a nice bloke, but i do not want to stick my finger up your bum, ever! Men are different than chicks (some of you IT people may not know that) they'll jump up and down and shout about their boob cancer every day if you give them a chance, but men tend to keep their prostates hidden, away from prying eyes (and fingers).

So give a dollar or two to prostate cancer research, both of us will be very happy you did in the long run. To sponsor my Mo please go to, enter my Rego number which is 1664 and your credit card details. Proceeds go to the Prostate Cancer Foundation of Australia to further research into Prostate Cancer. Donations of more than $2 are tax deductible.

Dr Evil and Dr Tommy G

Please give so that my Mo may grow!!
More info is available at

301 Posts
Dr Evil

I'm more worried about killing myself on my MV ..... and while I am lying in a contorted pose next to the armco, some shit comes by in a ute and lifts the MV into it.......... maybe I need to buy a self-destruct anti-theft device... sort of like the smal thermo-nuclear device that the alien in Predator had??????



56 Posts
Discussion Starter #3
Easy way to fix that is don't drop your bike.

Another way to go is to pick up the bike bandit (GPS GSM alarm), and while you are getting patched up in hospital get the GPS coords from the unit and send some friends round with a pair of pliers and a blow torch.

i had thought of rigging up a pepper spray canister in the ignition area, but that'd be a bummer if you set it off by accident, and i hear it's no good for your paint.

The bike bandit works wonders, and it's Aussie made and owned.
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